JOURNAL 98

JOURNAL 98

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Document status: June 10, 2003

Independent. God Said 4 is interesting as a dramatization of some of motives for Journey in Being

No action

CONTENTS

Comments 1

Issues With My Parents - resolution 2

A creek flows next to my camp. 3

God Said 4

Comments

This year’s log is short because much of the writing was directly entered into the target essays. Major work was on Consciousness, Nature, Mind, and the World; and Being and The Absolute

Issues With My Parents - resolution

They want me to visit. This is difficult. The issue gave me much difficulty. I thought about a lot and wrote quite a few notes. I discarded the bulk of the notes as “baggage.” Here is the resolution:

1. The difficulty. Work year, vacation, my life and mission

2. Focus: love

3. Talk once a week

A creek flows next to my camp

It is black in places, silver in others and at some spots there are silver wavelets flowing with the stream. It would be green by day but it is night, shadows are black, visible spaces have a silver ambience, lit by moonlight. Rocks in the stream are white. All about my tent amid the trees and behind is dark. Across the stream beams of light filter through branches, leaves shimmer, and there is an open patch of grass where, in a myth or a dream, bear might dance

Next day, afternoon, my space is filled by the sound of the stream, crickets, the hum and buzz of flying insects, sunlight and shade, trees and green, a gentle breeze carrying cool air, and occasional announcements by birds

God Said

I’m tired of sustaining the world, Anil, its up to you - you do it

ANIL REPLIED, AMUSED:

Why me…how?

G No special reason. I like the mountains where I saw you walking. It’s not personal. I’m focused on the work. I’m tired, I feel old. I want rest. I could go on

A [Thinking] Are my senses playing with me? Should I be humble? [Aloud] I’m listening

G I heard your thought. Reflection alone will not tell you whether this is an illusion - it was not meant to. Action is necessary too…and communication - give and take with others. As for humility or awe, you have felt that many times at my creation but there’s no need to feel humility before me. I’m not here to preach. As for the “how,” remember that you, too, every particle of you, are absolutely part of all being. You already participate in being without trying. Alienation - the poor humble me syndrome - is for wimps. Action makes your world whole. Actually I kind of like your attitude - you recognize limits but not their ultimate nature. But enough of theorizing, this not a classroom. There’s work to be done

A I’m interested

G Good. Work is hard but not divorced from play or dance

A You’re cool, G. I like you, too

G Don’t get too familiar. A little humility is good and proper

A Yes sir

G Are you with me

A I am

G Are you willing to take on the work?

A Tell me more

G You have only 25 years you’ll be 75 then, tired, and ready to retire. After that the world will have to fend for itself

A Yikes…pardon me…what’s wrong with that. And, I’ll never be tired

G Trust me, you’ll be tired. I’m weary. Nothing wrong. Just another lost opportunity. But, I ask myself, when will the universe realize its potential…be all that it can be?

A Sounds good. A little bit like a Hollywood movie

G The truth becomes clichéd, Anil

A You are right. Go on. I’m interested in this “let it all manifest here-now” idea even if it does sound a little new age

G I have some suggestions. First, you will have to change and prepare yourself

A It seems that I have trying that

G The task is not complete. Let me expound a little. Some schools of ~~Western~~ Philosophy are happy to discuss “truth” and the “good”…as though their intellectualizations would establish the ideas. They have been at it for 2500 years. Truth and good, as far as they are real are known in the human organism-in-its-world. That is the ground that gives life to ideas. Armchair intellectuals are not bad. I’m told by cannibals that they taste better than mountain men, that they’re more succulent. I know my silly humor will not offend you Anil

But by God, Anil, the philosophers and the zealots have been at it for over 3000 years

A Just a little speck of infinity, don’t you think?

G Sometimes evolution is slow. But realization, when the time is right, can take just an instant…and an instant can contain infinity

A What was that you said about armchair philosophers?

G [Ignoring the snide comment] You do not have forever. The first twenty years will be devoted to changing yourself…and your thought. That will leave five years to act. When you’re ready, action is rapid. You’re ideas must be whole, not piece-meal. They must be proactive and still open to learning

In the initial period you will live, think, experience…but - except to a limited circle - you will not speak. Your action will be your life and how you act and relate

Women, for the most part, will listen to you more readily than will men…but few will understand. You will have difficulty understanding your own effort. Your father will ridicule you

…then, for the rest of your life, you must act and speak

Any questions?

A Who am I? What am I?

G Here’s a mirror and a lens. What do you see?

A I see a wise man with a flowing white beard and a cane, looking out on the world, persuading others to nurture it. He is laughing, he is dancing to the music

G Somewhat chauvinistic, Anil, getting others to do the nurturing

A I’m not all-powerful like you

G You’re in denial. [Just like most people in advanced technological civilizations. Makes them better workers.] You are me…you and I are a cut of the same cloth

A What about the devil? What do we do about him? You have not spoken of him yet

G I did. He’s part of you. One reason for the twenty years of preparation and silence. But the guy with the horns, steamy breath, a hooked tail, and a leer on his face…that’s just a caricature of an archetype. I sent a couple of apprentices Sigmund and Carl Gustav to teach W. CIV. A thing or two. Oh, I almost forgot, and Friedrich, too. Brilliant fellow but prone to migraines and a little crazy. A misogynist. Had a love-hate thing with me. His reports of my death were a little exaggerated… Quick, before I go, what do you see in the mirror?

A Well, God, it looks like an OK world. Truly. Pain and “evil” are inherent in being…but there’s love and caring…and beauty. Perhaps we’re just a couple of old men out to make work for ourselves

G You are on your own. There is no rock upon which to sit, no bed in which to sleep, no final foundation upon which to know

A Should I be intimidated?

G That would not be bad. It would lead you to find the rock where it is. It’s a positive attitude. It means that the rock is in you…you must find that rock within yourself. Every being creates its own foundation